1. Halloween (2005 remake). The original was scary. The danger of doing a remake is that we know what's going to happen. Throwing in gratuitous sex, nudity (funny, only women were nude, you sexist jerks), and cursing doesn't improve the movie. You need to do better than that. And, while it's a nice idea to give us background on Michael Meyer's childhood, I felt the movie copped out: he was subjected to bullying in the home by his stepfather and sister, and by kids at school. He lived in poverty. His mother was an exotic dancer. The house was a slum. He kills little animals before moving onto the school bully. Serial killers, psychopaths, and sociopaths don't necessarily have these disadvantages. Think of Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy, etc. It felt like the writers and producers wanted to give Michael an excuse for his psychotic behavior. Most of the time, remakes suck.
2. Leatherface, Texax Chainsaw Massacre, Saw, et al. These movies, while they achieve scaring the crap out of people, do it by pure gore. I know it's based on a true story, but the intense gore is totally nauseating, especially as special effects get more realistic.
3. Sequels 2,3,4.... I'm laughing at Jason and Michael after the second sequel. Ghosts, demons, vampires, and other supernatural characters can be hard to kill and/or can be resurrected. In the original premise, Jason and Michael are fully human. There needs to be an arc for them to move from human to supernatural. (Can anyone say PLOT HOLE?) At least Freddie kills in your dreams, which allows for sequels (even though they were pale ghosts of the first movie). And enough with the sequels. No one cares about Freddie, Jason, Michael, and other very tired villains. There are wonderful writers out there. PICK. SOMETHING. NEW. (Pssst, I have an idea....and a ms.)
4. "Homemade" movies. While I thought the Paranormal Activity movies were excellent, Blair Witch was too shaky (looks like my hubs's videos at Christmas) making some people queasy. There was little tension because the camera bolts all over the place and it disorients the viewer. At least, I felt that way. And then they made a sequel? Didn't bother to watch that one.
Wanting to leave on a positive note, here are some of my faves and why:
- Dracula (1979, with Frank Langella). It had suspense and no plot holes, and seriously, Frank Langella is the sexiest vampire. (no sparkles). He is the epitome of an alluring villain- he doesn't even have to use his 'come to me' mojo to get the gal.
- Paranormal Activity. In the style of Hitchcock, these movies kept you on the edge of your seat, just waiting to see a shadow- you never had to see a ghost, demon, etc. Just footprints crossing a barrier of powder on the floor scared you. And, NO GORE! They used the barest minimum special effects, but it felt realistic enough to make you sleep with the lights on.
- My favorite Frankenstein movies are Victor Frankenstein (2015) with Daniel Radcliffe and James McAvoy, and the original b/w Frankenstein (1931). Not scary, but just so well done. Radcliffe and McAvoy bring freshness and twists to the original story. And the first is always a classic. Even over 80 years later, the purity of the original is unbeatable; Karloff is the best monster.
- Although not scary, The Mummy (1999) with Brendon Frasier and Rachel Weisz had humor, a few made-you-jump scenes, romance, history, and was all around a fresh take- we see how he became the Mummy and the set up for his return.
- The scariest movie ever- one that I will never watch again, is The Exorcist. If you've seen it, enough said. If you haven't, then you're afraid.....
Other faves: Blade series, The Mummy Returns, Alien, Jaws, Rosemary's Baby, Silence of the Lambs, Salem's Lot. While not all "Halloween" movies, these had tension and scenes that made you almost wet your pants. Non-scary movies: Practical Magic, Hocus Pocus, Young Frankenstein.
I could list tons more, but you get the gist.
Wishing you Happy Haunts and Halloween!
Char
