Be Happy, Dammit!

 

Photo by Cleyder Duque from Pexels

I don't know where I got this list from, (apologies to the author) but it bears repeating. It's been a tough almost 2 years for all of us, although some people have suffered more. Mere words like "Be Happy!" seem almost like cruel platitudes. 

Nevertheless... I firmly believe (having learned the hard way) you can't get true happiness by depending on others; it has to come from within. Here are 6 precises for a happier life:

1.  Don't let the past haunt you; the mistakes have been made. Learn the lesson and move on. (Just don't forget the mistakes and repeat them!)

2.  No one can make you angry, unhappy, resentful, bitter, etc. unless you let them. (yeah, I struggle with this one too because of all our relationships and interconnectedness, but I try.)

3.  No one controls your life or destiny. It is in your hands. Take and maintain control. (Another tough one because of bonds with others.).

4.  Your future can always be changed. You are not stuck anywhere if you don't want to be. 

5.  You are not dependent upon others for your life; use your brains, talents, ambitions, and soul to find your own path.

6.  Nothing is guaranteed in life- not love, health, success, friendship, or luck.

There are things I do every day to be happy: I write, I collect my strawberries, I work in my garden, I go biking, hiking, and swimming, I laugh with my family, and I take some solitude time to read, care for myself, or just be. Discovering what makes you happy can lead you to many new things.

Happy exploration!

Char

Monday Again, So Blog This!

Monday. Blog Day.

I don't have anything to write about. I'm trying to revise an NA (new adult) novel but with my right hand/arm in a brace and hurting, typing is hard. Even worse is that I like to print out my novel and revise while reading the comments from critique group members. I hate the double screen because everything's too squishy (I work on a laptop, so I don't have a big desk monitor). I have ideas for other books, but don't want to start until I clean up the several I'm working on so I can submit them.

Weeded my meditation garden with my left hand. I think by the time my right arm gets normal,  my left is going to look like Hellboy's giant stone fist.

Enough boring you with complaints. How about I show you a little happy?

My bee balm bloomed (say that 3 times fast). I love the coral color.

My astilbe popped with color. And yes, I had to go to Dictionary.com for the proper spelling because I was pronouncing it wrong.

I don't know what these pretty purple peeps (I'm obviously in the mood for alliteration), but they are one of my faves. I have them in front, pool, and meditation gardens. If you know, tell me!

The only way for my lilies to bloom is to put them in pots. Rabbits? Chipmunks? Gophers? I don't know but SOMEBODY is eating them.

And finally, have a happy, and SAFE Fourth of July. While our current situation is far from perfect, we have a good beginning as stated in the Declaration of Independence:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. 

We have not always employed these ideals, but that doesn't mean it can't be done. We need to work harder to embrace all humanity. We must learn from the past to improve our future. Don't give up- we can make it work.

CHAR 

Some of this, some of that...

I can now type with 2 hands, so it's time for a new post. But since my broken right arm can only last for 10 minutes before it starts to hurt like heck and swell, this is going to be a short post-

1- Dr checkup tomorrow, hopefully find out why wrist is so bad.
2- Arm break slowly (and I mean SLOWLY) getting better.
3- Revisions on my new projects is frustratingly slow because of stupid wrist.
4- Bunny moved out of my strawberry patch and didn't eat any strawberries...
5- Mating foxes need to learn that 'outdoor voices' ends at midnight.
6- I will spend most of this week in my bathing suit, poolside. Can't go anywhere anyway...
7- Trying to get more followers/friends on my Facebook author page- Author Charlotte Bennardo- which will be my main page in the future.
8- September is going to be crazy busy because by then I should be able to paint my living room.
9- Working in a new genre- adult sweet romance/drama. Children's publishing is a tough market.
10- Spending too much time wondering when life will get back to normal- and slowly realizing it will never be the same...

Oh, and here are some happy pictures of my meditation garden because we all need moments of peace and sanity...

Geraniums are such happy flowers..

My middle son loved daisies when he was little, so I make sure I always have them in my garden.

Since I put up a better fence, the bunnies and deer can't eat my astible. It's never looked this good!

Day lilies- how can you look at them and not smile?

Yarrow- some say weed, some say wildflower, I say pretty.

Cracked birdbath works as a pedestal planter.

So there's some happy for you. Hope to share more Good Things and give everyone just a tiny bit of serenity...


Char

In the Writer's Garden

Anyone who knows me or has read my social media know that I have a meditation garden, love flowers, and feel bad for weeds (which are just misplaced plants). Over the winter, a heavy snowfall  broke a tree in half (we discovered later that the inside of the tree was rotted).

It landed on the wire fence, so both had to be removed. Two weeks ago, the tree was cut down and just this past weekend, I fixed the fence. (Yes, I did.) Without that tree, more sun shines on the garden. I had worked around the shade, planting sun-loving flowers in pots or on the outside edges. Now half the garden stood in the glare of the sun.

Changes had to be made.

It reminded me of my novels. You start to build one way, but things happen- critiques, editor/agent comments, lost plot threads, etc. It requires major changes. Some plants could stay where they were, some had to be moved, and some were crushed by the tree guys. I needed to add full sun plants, move around statues and objects of interest. In my novels I've had to change endings, kill off some characters and add others, and I've had to revise/add/delete language. What results is the same garden (book) but it's different.

Here are the results:

The long view

A new addition - red grass

My black-eyed Susans blooming. They are a lustful bunch- all over the place!

Calendra - I love the pink and green

A burgundy dracenia spike

A bird house crafted by YMCA camp kids thanking me for my donation

No garden is complete without a gazing ball

I have a statue for each son - this is Alec, my animal lover

This is Thomas, my Harry Potter/avid reader fan

This is Collin, my gardening buddy (when he was younger and wanted to help)

The fixed fence (I do nice work). See my pretty blue chair?

I turned the stump into a pedestal 

The first time my lily bloomed! 

My cats love the garden too!

So that's where I've spent some time. I hope my novel looks and turns out as good as my garden. With both, I don't follow traditional rules- I don't like stuffy, formal gardens, but I don't like chaos either. Same with my books; I hate angst and stereotypical characters but I love books that touch me emotionally. 

Now to fix that novel...

Char 

Where There's A Will...

...you can find a way.

Yes, that sounds like contrite, cliched advice. True, nonetheless. Want to write a novel or learn to play an instrument or paint a mural on your dining room wall (or name your project)? Oh, but you can't, because (cue excuses) you don't have time or space or whatever...

B.S.

Want to see determination? Want to see a successful "I'm not going to be stopped, I WILL achieve my goal!"

Check out my garden. Those big leafy plants on the right are cucumbers and zucchini. You can't see it, but next to them is a fence. They kind of got squished in.

But behind every hardship is a story of courage, valor, or just plain "I'm doing this and nothing is going to stop me." Here's how one cucumber overcame the limited space the rose bush and his other cucumber buddies imposed on him, forcing him to grow against the fence:

He grew where he was. See the big bully cucumber at bottom right? He took all the space. That didn't stop this guy. When it got cramped and the fence tried to stop him from growing, he found a new direction:

He grew outside the fence. (Ruining the fence in the process, but hey, job accomplished.) He didn't let boundaries, imposed on him by others, stop him. He grew where he could, then took the space he needed.

That's YOU. Grow where you can, but when that doesn't work, you have to be stronger, overcome your fences. No matter what the goal- higher education, writing a book, learning a skill, improving your health- remember this:

NO BOUNDARIES WILL STOP ME.  

So get going. And may your fight and journey be successful.

Char

That Blank Space...

This is a blank space.

It's where my veggie garden will bloom and flourish (I hope).

It's kind of like that blank page, canvas, wall, piece of fabric, or musical staff. It needs to be filled, worked on, trimmed, redone, watered, planned.

Loved.

Hated.

It needs attention, it demands time, it sucks energy.

Whatever your creative medium, give it what it craves and take away what's not good. Keep your efforts going even when editors, gardeners, Mother Nature, mentors, friends, or anything else intervenes.

Only you can see the potential in that bit of dirt. That empty page. That unused canvass. That bolt of cloth. That musical scale.

Char